Let's just say I know someone who loves deeply.
Or at least...
they're convinced they do.
When we discuss this and I say things like:
"You should check on them."
"You should spend time with them."
"You should play with them."
"You should show them they matter."
they usually respond with,
"You don't understand. I know how much I love them. If anybody ever messes with them, it's going to be on sight."
I believe them.
I really do.
The problem is...
what if that moment never comes?
What if nobody ever attacks them?
What if no great crisis ever happens?
What if life remains wonderfully ordinary?
How will the people you love know they are loved?
Also...
Why should love need an emergency before it becomes visible?
I also realized we sometimes do the same thing in marriage.
"I'll always be there if you need me."
That's a beautiful promise.
But what about today?
What about the ordinary Tuesday?
The random phone call.
The unexpected hug.
The text message that simply says,
"I'm thinking about you."
Love shouldn't only show up in the fire.
It should also show up at breakfast.
Some spouses are waiting for a moment to prove their love.
Meanwhile, their husband or wife is simply waiting to experience it.
Love that only appears during disasters can unintentionally feel absent during daily life.
Have you noticed that Jesus didn't only demonstrate His love at the cross?
Although, that was the ultimate expression.
But before the cross, He spent time with people.
He listened to them.
He ate with them.
He taught them.
He wept with them.
He noticed them.
The cross proved His love.
His life revealed it.
Marriage needs both.
Grand gestures have their place.
But marriages are rarely sustained by grand gestures.
They're sustained by ordinary faithfulness repeated over time.
Proverbs 27:9 tell us,
"The sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel."
Notice the word 'sweetness'?
Not the heroics.
Sometimes the sweetest expressions of love are the smallest ones.
Checking in.
Paying attention.
Remembering.
Serving.
Laughing together.
Holding hands.
Making eye contact.
Those things rarely go viral.
But they build marriages.
If your spouse has to wait for a tragedy before they feel deeply loved...
something is missing.
Love should not be hidden behind hypothetical situations.
"If anything ever happened..."
No.
Show it while nothing is happening.
Because the greatest proof of love isn't always what you would do in extraordinary moments.
Sometimes it's what you consistently do in ordinary ones.
So don't wait for someone to threaten your spouse before they discover how much you value them.
Don't wait for sickness before becoming attentive.
Don't wait for loss before becoming affectionate.
Don't wait for regret before becoming intentional.
Why wait to prove...
what you can show today?
👣 Be Better. 💛 Love Better. 🙌🏾 Do Better. 💍Marriage Works.
© Lanre Olagbaju
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