But stay with me.
Ever walked into a bathroom right after someone used it and immediately gone,
“Ewwww… that stinks.”
Especially when you shared the bathroom with someone else.
And you’re right.
It does stink.
But here’s the funny part.
Yours doesn’t smell like Dior Sauvage either.
Somehow, we become very aware of other people’s mess…
while acting strangely unfamiliar with our own.
Now bring that into marriage.
Because there are things we complain about constantly…
that we also do.
The interruptions.
The attitude.
The forgetfulness.
The shutting down.
The tone.
We notice it quickly when it comes from them.
But when it comes from us?
We explain it.
“I’m just stressed.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“You misunderstood me.”
And maybe that’s part of the problem.
Matthew 7:3 says,
“Why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but fail to notice the plank in your own?”
Notice the wording.
Fail to notice.
Not because the plank isn’t there.
Because familiarity blinds you to it.
It’s easier to smell someone else’s mess.
Harder to admit yours lingers too.
And marriage has a way of exposing that.
Because proximity reveals things.
The real you....not curated-you, not public-you.
You-you.
And truth be told…
some of the things we vent about the loudest…
are reflections.
Not always completely.
But enough to humble us a little.
Which is why grace matters so much in marriage.
Not the fake kind that avoids accountability.
The real kind.
The kind that remembers:
“I also need patience sometimes.”
“I also get it wrong sometimes.”
“I also leave messes behind me.”
Galatians 6:1 reminds us,
“If someone is caught in a fault… restore them gently.”
Gently.
Not because the issue doesn’t matter.
But because you understand what it means to be human too.
And while we’re here…
let’s not ignore the other side.
If you know something stinks…
do something about it.
Spray the air freshener.
Do the courtesy flush.
Literally…
and figuratively.
Don’t leave unnecessary messes behind expecting everyone else to adjust to them.
Apologize quicker.
Clean up your attitude.
Fix what you can fix.
Because maturity in marriage is not pretending you never stink.
It’s being aware enough to not leave the room worse for the other person.
So maybe next time you’re irritated by something your spouse does…
pause for a second.
Not just to ask,
“Why are they like this?”
But also,
“Do I do this too?”
Because humility has a smell too.
And trust me…
it’s much better to live with.
👣 Be Better. 💛 Love Better. 🙌🏾 Do Better. 💍Marriage Works.
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