I saw a Jay Shetty interview where he said:
"No one will ever love you exactly the way you want."
Not because they don’t care.
Not because they’re unwilling.
But because love doesn’t arrive customized to our preferences.
Love comes and flows through people...
with their personalities, their wiring, their histories, their limitations.
So sometimes love looks like coffee waiting in the morning.
Not poetry.
Sometimes it’s a made bed.
Not a long conversation.
Sometimes it’s a check-in call while you’re on the road,
or food ordered to your hotel room while away from home...
because someone remembered you’d be too tired to decide.
They may not say “I love you” the way you expect.
It may not look like the version of love you rehearsed in your head.
But it is love.
And here’s where many of us miss it.
We focus on what wasn’t done
We point out the one thing they didn’t say.
The one thing they forgot.
The one thing they didn’t do this time.
And while we’re speaking our disappointment,
they’re standing there thinking:
How did you miss everything else I did?
Because love doesn’t grow well under constant critique.
It doesn’t expand under disappointment.
You don’t inspire someone to give more
by making them feel like what they gave didn’t matter.
That’s not how the human heart works.
People lean in when they feel valued.
There’s something powerful about being noticed.
Not for the big, dramatic gestures...
but for the quiet, consistent ones.
When someone realizes their effort landed…
when they feel recognized, not measured…
when their extended love language is acknowledged, even if it’s different from yours…
it makes them feel good.
People don’t love more when they’re made to feel inadequate.
They love more when they feel appreciated.
The Bible doesn’t frame love as demanding perfection.
It frames love as attentive, patient, and generous.
“Love is patient, love is kind…
It keeps no record of wrongs.” - 1 Corinthians 13:4–5
Keeping no record doesn’t mean ignoring hurt.
It means not tallying love like a transaction.
And Scripture also reminds us:
“Encourage one another and build each other up.”- 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Encouragement builds.
Constant disappointment erodes.
This doesn’t mean silence or suppression
Noticing the little things doesn’t mean you never express needs.
It doesn’t mean settling for less than what matters.
It means leading with gratitude before correction.
It means acknowledging effort before requesting growth.
It means understanding that love often shows up imperfectly...but sincerely.
Because when someone knows you see their heart,
they become more open to hearing your needs.
Maybe love isn’t always about asking for more
Maybe sometimes love is about recognizing what’s already there.
The effort that wasn’t announced.
The care that wasn’t dramatic.
The love that didn’t match your script...but showed up anyway.
When the little things are noticed,
they don’t stay little.
They multiply.
👣 Be Better. 💛 Love Better. 🙌🏾 Do Better. 💍Marriage Works.
Sometimes the most loving thing you can do...
is simply pay attention.
No comments:
Post a Comment