May You Not Marry Your Enemy

May you not marry your enemy in the name of Jesus.

The prayer may sound dramatic, but it is powerful.

Dear single,

Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, once gave an instruction that feels especially relevant here:

“Be innocent as doves, but wise as serpents.” - Matthew 10:16

Notice the balance?

He wasn't talking about being suspicious or naive.

He was talking about something pure...but perceptive.

Beyond the glitz, there is a stranger

Strip away the excitement.

The dates.

The sweet words.

The chemistry.

The wedding planning.

The pictures.

The applause.

At its core, marriage is this:

You are formally agreeing to build your entire life with someone you do not fully know.

Not trying to scare you...just stating reality.

No matter how long you’ve dated.

No matter how spiritual they sound.

No matter how well they present.

You never know someone completely.

That’s why wisdom matters.

Never ignore the check in your spirit

If something feels off, don’t rush to explain it away.

Don’t drown it out with excitement.

Don’t silence it with “maybe I’m overthinking.”

Discernment often whispers before danger ever shouts.

The Bible doesn’t tell us to panic...it tells us to pay attention.

“The prudent see danger and take refuge.” - Proverbs 22:3

Wisdom notices patterns.

Wisdom watches consistency.

Wisdom asks questions even when answers are uncomfortable.

Let’s be honest.

Love before marriage often feels intense.

Exciting.

Overwhelming.

Butterflies in the stomach.

Late-night conversations.

The feeling that this must be “the one.”

But butterflies are not loyalty.

They are not character.

They are not commitment.

They leave.

And when they do, what remains is the person...

their habits, values, fears, integrity, anger, generosity, faith, and worldview.

Marriage survives on love in marriage, not infatuation before it.

Education is not wisdom

You can be brilliant and still be foolish in relationships.

That you know many things does not mean you know what matters.

Wisdom is the ability to see clearly and choose well.

And Scripture gives us a gift in James 1:5:

“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God… and it will be given.”

God is not stingy with wisdom.

But He expects us to ask...and to listen.

Look before you leap

Your heart.

Your future.

Your peace.

Your calling...may depend on it.

Marriage is not a gamble.

It is not something to rush into because time is passing or pressure is loud.

So I beseech you once again...gently, sincerely:

Look before you leap.

Ask the hard questions.

Pay attention to inconsistencies.

Invite God into your decisions early, not after damage is done.

And may you not marry your enemy...

someone who fights your peace, erodes your faith, or slowly undoes you from the inside.

👣 Be Better. 💛 Love Better. 🙌🏾 Do Better. 💍Marriage Works.

Wisdom today saves years of pain tomorrow.