I was watching a Dhar Mann video the other day...the kind that teaches life lessons through simple stories. In the comment section, someone asked, “What movie is this from?”
Clearly, they weren’t familiar with Dhar Mann’s work.
It was an honest question.
What baffled me wasn’t the question though...it was the responses.
Some were kind, sure.
But many were sarcastic, dismissive, even mean.
The irony?
The whole point of the video was kindness...how it comes back to you.
How it matters.
How we all need it.
Yet...here were people watching a video about kindness, taking notes on kindness...and still choosing to be unkind.
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I thought about this for a while; how sometimes in marriage, there is a disconnect between what we hear and how we live.
There is so much content out there today aimed at helping people improve their marriages.
Podcasts.
Sermons.
YouTube channels.
Instagram reels.
We’re surrounded by advice.
Immersed in wisdom.
And still, many couples are stuck in the same toxic cycles...because consuming truth and choosing truth are not the same.
It’s not that the voice of good is silent.
It’s that some folks have gotten so used to their ways, they can’t even see how wrong they are anymore.
Correction feels like attack.
Accountability feels like disrespect.
Every reminder to love better sounds like a personal insult.
They heard the message.
They just didn’t change.
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Sadly, we can get to a point in marriage, or in life generally, where the heart becomes dull.
Not because God stopped speaking.
Not because our spouse stopped trying.
But because we stopped listening.
Jesus said in Matthew 13:15: “For this people’s heart has grown dull, and with their ears they can barely hear, and their eyes they have closed...”
This isn’t about ignorance.
It’s about willful blindness.
That moment when you know you’re wrong, but your pride won’t let you say it.
When you know your tone was off, but you blame the other person’s sensitivity.
When you know you’ve been neglectful, but all you do is point out how you pay the bills.
Truth is...we don’t need more content.
We need more conviction.
We need more humility.
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Kindness only works if we live it.
Love only transforms if we surrender to it.
A marriage only thrives if both people allow truth to touch their character.
If you’ve heard all the sermons, watched all the clips, and still treat your spouse like they’re disposable...you don’t have a knowledge problem.
You have a heart problem.
Ask God for help.
David said in Psalm 51:10 “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.”
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The world doesn’t need more viral marriage quotes.
It needs more husbands and wives who actually live what they post.
It needs couples who are quick to listen, slow to speak, and even slower to take offense.
It needs people who choose growth over ego. Conviction over comfort.
Kindness is still powerful.
Change is still possible.
God is still in the business of transforming hearts.
Just don’t be the one who heard the truth and stayed the same.
👣 Be Better. 💛 Love Better. 🙌🏾 Do Better. 💍 Marriage Works.
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