Treat Them Like You Almost Lost Them

(Got into some conversations after yesterday's post and I had to do a sequel.)

There’s a kind of gratitude that only hits after a near loss.

You see it in the way people talk about loved ones they almost lost to illness or tragedy...how it recalibrates their entire perspective. 

Suddenly, the little annoyances don’t matter. 

They hold hands more. 

They listen harder. 

They say “I love you” like they mean it. 

Because they do.

But what if we didn’t wait for almost losing to appreciate what we have?

In marriage, it’s easy to get used to the presence of someone who was once your answered prayer. 

The person you once begged God for now shares your bathroom sink. And slowly, subtly, appreciation can turn into assumption.

Until something shakes you.

A health scare. 

A close call. 

A major fight. 

A wake-up call.

Truth is: you shouldn’t need a crisis to remind you that your spouse is a gift.

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Familiar doesn't mean Forgettable

We think “familiarity breeds contempt,” but that’s only true when intentionality dies.

Familiarity can breed comfort, safety, warmth, and depth...if we still choose to see.

To see them as irreplaceable.

To speak to them like someone who matters.

To touch them like you still mean it.

To hold space for their fears and dreams, even if you’ve heard them before.

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The Bible says, in Romans 5:8, “God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

Love shows up before it’s deserved.

Love gives its best before there’s loss.

Love doesn’t wait until things are hanging by a thread.

So why do we?

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Think about it; What if you treated them like you almost lost them?

Would you still nitpick the dishes?

Would you still scroll through your phone while they talk? (I'm super guilty of this...working on it)

Would you still roll your eyes at their quirks?

Or would you hold them longer...

Speak more gently...

Forgive more quickly...

Because you can lose what you take for granted.

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Don’t wait for the marriage to be on life support before you bring flowers.

Don’t wait for silence before you say what needs to be said.

Don’t wait for almost-losing before you start loving.

Treat them like you almost lost them. Because one day...

👣 Be Better. 💛 Love Better. 🙌🏾 Do Better. 💍 Marriage Works.